As On Arrakis, In My Mind

Abandonment mélange is just another name for Spice
When it is present, it is omnipresent
Touching every aspect of a life
Infecting it, addicting it, shifting all its precepts

Creating a dependence on its cinnamon-like dust
Now, is it sweet or is it bitter? Can you differentiate?
When it changes, too, the world’s trust
Making dune seas of the lushest place?

Desert planet, made of fear, no water to find anywhere
Scraping by on thimblefuls of life’s limiting need
A lifetime spent without the rain, just choking bone-dry air
All travelers be warned in time, all travelers take heed:

This spice will graft itself to you, rewire your very mind
It also opens you in ways no training ever could
Once infested in your brain, it can’t be left behind
But once you learn control you wouldn’t, even if you should

~Elena Nola

When the Light Is Low

I feel drunk on moonlight and hope
Reckless from the silver glow

And the whispers of conspiracy carried in
On this restless autumn wind

The sweetness of this life sparkling
A glaze upon my cheeks

I know what price I paid to be this free
And how long to the hour it took to render

Somehow still it dazzles me in sunshine
Robs me of breath and blurs my eyes

Some things are just easier to see
When the light is low

~Elena Nola

The First Cold Night

October moon eclipsed
By slender tri-part trunk of elm
All other stars burned out
By its relentless beams
The planet just below
The only light in view
Now crisp and cleanly framed
Black-shadowed wood on night

A single yellow leaf released

It falls

Like fire from the sky

~Elena Nola

To Enter the Shadow

A shamanic prayer for the time of year – or the times of life – that ask us to enter the darkness of our pain and our past and examine what is there. Perhaps there might be a call to bring light or healing. But perhaps the simple alchemy of witnessing our own experience without flinching or denying what it was, is all the magic we need.

And, we don’t have to walk into that darkness alone. We can call for aid.

“To Enter the Shadow”

Come Odin, come Lady, come wisdom
Come ravens, come falcon, come runesong
Come hunting, come seeking, come finding
Come Odin, come Lady, come witness

Come autumn, come wild-wind, come fire
Come harvest, come feasting, come culling
Come omens, come portents, come warnings
Come autumn, come threshold, come fire

Come winter, come darkness, come shadow
Come memory, come vision, come stories
Come courage, come honor, come changes
Come shadow, come darkness, come winter

Come Odin, come Lady, come witness
Come sorrow, come anger, come grieving
Come insight, come choices, come freedom
Come Odin, come Lady, come wisdom

~Elena Nola

Highway 7 West, October, 7:28 PM

Two seconds’ notice and oncoming lights 
Your scuttling steps were swift on cement
Your wobbling walk blending in with brown road

Why were you on that bridge

The unnatural predator of the midnight river rolled on
Inexorable
Nowhere to turn, nowhere to go
It could not stop for you and did not swerve

Inevitable outcome
Your soft body barely a bump beneath its weight
More sound than feeling
The brush of fur on fiberglass, rubber on bone

Why were you on that bridge 

There was no purpose in the taking
No exchange, no life for life, for sustenance or survival 
Nothing sacred, just unholy probabilities

Incidental death, a side effect
Collateral damage from this black tar current
A killing machine your instincts were not designed to evade

Why were you on that bridge 

~Elena Nola

Faith

I think sometimes about
That princess in that tower

How she could do nothing
To help her hero’s cause

Except exist, and by existing
Inspire him to struggle on

How much trust must she have had
In the sufficiency of all her charms?

She had no reason to believe -
No confirmation that she could

Call him in and motivate him
Past all strife and horror

How much faith must she have had
In herself to be exactly what he wanted

And worth everything he gave to win her?
I feel like that princess in that tower

In the dark myself, yet still a beacon
Unable to assist the fight

Or even know if it has happened
Unable, too, to circumvent the challenge

My only task - MY hero’s test -
Is to believe myself enough

To trust my worth, with no evidence
At all, and live in faith

That he will fight, and he will come
And he will be enough - and so will I

From One Jane Austen Heroine To Another

He is no Mr. Darcy to elevate you, Elizabeth,
His silence not from shyness but from secrets.
Not shame – he proved himself shameless,
Unrepentant for his deeds, boastful at their intemperate allure
And unapologetic of his indulgence –
But calculation, a deliberate deceit born of keen awareness
That his choice must redefine his character
To anyone of sense or conscience.
Fair of face and false of heart, wickedness
Surpassing cleverness within his breast.
A liar and a user, he casts himself as victim,
A martyr to his feelings, his honor needful tithe
Upon the altar of affection, never seeing
That love esteems and respects before it adulates,
And any “love” which sacrifices either is not worthy of the name,
As he, indeed, is not worthy of the title hero.
He is no Darcy, proud and just and true –
But only Henry Crawford.

A Man Who Calls Me Darlin’

I want a man who calls me darlin'
Whose roots touch mine 
Not the same soil, but the same shade
Close enough to drink from the same ground water

I want a man who has two hearts 
One for each of mine
Art and dirt, or roots and sky
Close enough to speak the same dialect of difference

I want a man who takes me dancing
Whose steps match mine 
Who lets me come and go in rhythm long developed
Close enough to flying to call it the same name

I want a man who calls me darlin'
-Elena Nola